Monday, May 14, 2012

Urine for it.

Tonight I cleaned the house.  C-L-E-A-N-E-D it.  I vacuumed, dusted, swept, mopped, scoured, scrubbed and washed.

Back before my therapist broke up with me (have I told you that my therapist broke up with me?  Perhaps that can be tomorrow's blog) she had me make a list of my values, in order of importance.  Making that list helped me fix some of the stress in my life. Turns out, when your behavior is not in line with your values, you get stress. 

Now cleaning, cleanliness, a sparkling house... that was WAY down on my values list.  But I was acting as if it were number one.  Or number two, maybe.  But high up there.  And it was...

So now I am no longer so worried about little messes and picking up an elaborate toy set up in the living room which will just make an eventual return the next day.  Tad and I made a deal in which he does all the dishes and most of the laundry while I do the other stuff.  And I only do a big deep clean on the house one night a month.  Tonight was that night.

And what do you think happened to me as a result of putting cleaning where it belonged on my values list?  I got happier. I got rid of some stress.  And it really doesn't make that much of a difference in the overall clean-feeling of my house. 

Except for one place:

The upstairs toilet.

Which is where the children use the bathroom. 

Seriously, what is with boys?  When I go to clean that thing, there is urine EVERYWHERE! It's on the floor all around the toilet. It's all around the top.  The edges of the seat are actually tinted yellow.  What is the deal?!  I mean, does he ever even pee INSIDE the toilet at ALL?

You'd think with such a handy dandy aiming device as the penis, you'd be able to make it into the big target of a toilet bowl.  But alas...I think boys must get interested in other things. Indeed, I've seen him lose track of the task at hand, turning to talk to me as I walk by or just looking aimlessly around the bathroom.

Perhaps as he grows up, his aim...ahem...concentration will improve.  Tad assures me this is the case.  In the meantime, cleaning isn't so bad when only done once a month.  Except for the toilets. For now.

Here's my poem:

Don't look at the ceiling or the door. Watch where you pee or it's on the floor!
Just pay attention, aim your pee, so your mom won't have to clean.

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