"Even after all this time, the sun never says to the earth, 'You owe me.' Look what happens with a love like that. It lights up the whole sky."
I just read this quote on my friend Nathan's blog and I had to pass it on. It feels a little kismetty that I read it this morning, because I've been thinking a LOT about love and its existence. Whether people really believe in it. And I let some things, recently, shake that belief a little.
But here's the thing. I believe in it. I believe in love. True love. Soul mates. Love of one's life. Whatever you want to call it. I have believed in this love since I was twelve years old. I remember because when I was twelve, I made a list of five things I wanted to do before I died. Here it is:
1. Fall in love
2. Join the Peace Corps
3. Make a record.
4. Write a novel
5. Hold a monkey
I have done the first three (well I made a CD--there weren't CDs yet when I made that list). I am working on number four. And I have a reasonable belief that I can manage number five at some point in my life.
Anyway, I do believe in it. And it doesn't mean I believe in the 'happily ever after' fairy tale kind. I believe in working your ass off to make relationships work. And I believe sometimes you work and it isn't enough. I know people marry for reasons other than love, or that sometimes love can grow from friendship. I know there is all kinds of love. I know a lot of people going through divorces right now, going through troubled times. And Tad and I have certainly struggled. We struggled HARD in the beginning of our relationship. There was a time I wasn't sure we'd make it. And this month, we'll have been married for only nine years. That's just the age of a child, in terms of marriage. It's really relatively new still. And we'll keep working, and we'll run across trouble and I know I can't know what will happen in the future. But I know that now, when he calls me in the middle of the day or I see him unexpectedly...my heart still leaps.
Both my parents recently and independently of each other, told me not to stop believing in it. So I will listen to my parents. And to myself and keep believing in the kind of love that lights up the sky.