I was stressed out this morning.
I had a bevy of tasks to complete--tasks for work, tasks for the kids' school, tasks for our own house.
Here's how I looked at the beginning of the day:
I was thinking about how I am doing way too many things and not doing any of them particularly well. I'm a mom, but I keep having to work at night so I don't feel like a very good mom. And I'm a Youth Leadership Specialist but I'm in the planning stages of events right now and I'm so scattered I'm either procrastinating or starting one thing and then multi-tasking my way out of it so I don't feel like a very good Youth Leadership Specialist. And I'm a volunteer at my kids' school but I'm so busy with mom-ing and working that I keep forgetting details of this event I'm planning this weekend so I'm not feeling like a very good volunteer either.
And then at work I started thinking, as I sorted through emails, about how I can't just put my work life and home life and personal life in these separate boxes and try to do each thing separately and perfectly. Because they're all related. All those parts of my life are part of me and it's okay that they sort of run and bleed into each other. My kids and my job and the rest of my life... It's all my life.
And then my office phone rang and it was this woman from this amazing nature preserve offering me space for my Youth Leadership Summit this summer. And I with a secured venue, I was able to finish the flyer and the application and send out a lot of correspondence about the program. Plus it's just an extremely exciting place and collaboration and opportunity. And then I got my work done and headed out to a meeting and to pick up supplies for work and groceries for home. I had time then to bake some brownies for the school event at home and then got everything ready for the weekend program while I was at school getting the kids.
My children and I had a lovely night together and we all hung out in the bathroom while each of them bathed and I told them stories and we all laughed. And after they were all tucked in and I was beginning to get mad at myself for zoning out on TV, my friend called me and we had a nice talk and I was glad. So here's how I look now.
I tried Googling pictures of "Self-Satisfied" but then I thought it would be better to show you my own self-satisfied face.
Sometimes you don't get it all done in one day...but sometimes you do. And today I did.
And either way, at the end of the day I'm a mom and a youth leadership specialist and a volunteer and lots of other things too. Not good or bad. Just me. Doing my best. Aren't we all?